Posted by: justbewhoyouare | June 14, 2010


In the past I was the king of analyzing (notice the word anal here) and have in my humanness torn everything apart piece by piece yearning for answers. You really have no idea at this point how true this is so you’re going to just have to trust me… 

Ah, now there’s a 5-letter word to study—trust. Do we understand what it means? The reason we as dynamic angelic beings (truly God in all its glory) took on a physical form, in a very dense limited place where time and space causes us to have to slow down our vibration, is very simple. It was to develop trust. Trust is the ability to tune into who we really are and just be OK with that, for this is what we are. We surrounded ourselves with an imaginary, illusory world and gave ourselves a mind so we could survive in this maze, and it was all so we could experience ourselves on an even playing field. No one remembers we are God also yet it is true for all. Everyone has the same desire deep inside: to remember. Yet it has taken centuries for even the simplest awareness of this to truly take root within our consciousness while we are within this dense world. 

Jesus was no different than you or I. He wanted to know and at the same time, volunteered to come in at a time when collectively we all yearned for something new—not too much, for we were very much lost still in our own games—all the emotional ranting and ravings that the human loves to get so very trapped into—but still a change nonetheless. And Jesus remembered who he was. But as a human he paid a big price for having chosen to remember within the thick ignorant energy of the time. And yet, it was all perfect, for again, he volunteered to do this, knowing full well before coming in that there was a huge likelihood that he could suffer the fate that he did. But then, this is the point. We are in love with this game called Earth. We cannot wait to come back when we get over to the other side because it is an adventure—and an opportunity that we all devised so we could expand our hearts. No where else in any dimension can you find a game quite like this one. Any entity who wants to truly expand into a depth of love awareness that is indefinable, full of infinite potential, and boundless when it comes to the ability to continue to expand into areas that no one has ever once dreamt of, has to go through this experiment to get there. Yes, there are many other experiments out there in the dimensions, but none that require us to develop the level of trust that this planet does. 

Back to trust. Jesus was a man who had forgotten who he is, like you and me, but then found a trust in his Self that set him apart from the rest. This is why he was able to do the things he did, courageously. Initially, he was not without fear and doubt. That’s part of the process of growing in trust. The human doubts yet the true divine Self knows. Which will we identify with—what the doubter is telling us (which is what the mind contributes to this adventure) or what the divine angel that we are tells us (which is the source of true knowing)? Deep in our inner being we know who we are—but who will identify with this and act according to its inspirational pull? Being in the now is the only way for this to occur. The now is a place without judgment for it has no past to compare. It is a place without agenda for it has no future plans. It just is. The now is where the divine dwells within us. Jesus found this out and as the divine he was compelled to stand up to the earthly rule (of the mind) and speak his truth. As a human he would not have necessarily chosen this (that is, if he left it up to his mind to make the decision). In other words, his mind, which was full of fear and doubt like the rest of us, would have never dreamed of putting himself in circumstances that would lead to his death. Who would choose that? The mind will always argue with such choices. But that is why it is so challenging to remember who we are. The mind gets in the way and wants to understand and know (and anything it is afraid of wants to run from). But it never really can figure it out. Nothing is ever satisfying enough. And you know why? Because what it’s trying to figure out is why it has to give up control to this “now” that doesn’t look very inviting, certainly not romantic, and especially because this now does not allow it to be in control. So the mind is constantly asking why it should give up its very identity (and being in control is its identity. It thinks it is in control when in fact, it—the mind—is the source of all illusion). It has no desire to do this—none whatsoever. 

Ascension, the term for transforming from human to divine consciousness, does not allow the past or future within its walls. Until now the human body has not been capable of holding the divine energy while still hanging out within the illusion. Jesus found this out. The more he remembered who he was (moving into the now), the more it became clear to him that he could not stay here in physical form. He realized to truly ascend he needed to transcend his body and so (his divine Self) allowed for the crucifixion. And in terms of its overall contribution to the evolution of consciousness among humans, his crucifixion represented the transforming from the human to the divine. When his body gave out he ascended. At that point he was free to come back and teach further—as an ascended master. But he said we would do greater things than even he because he knew that there would come a time when we would choose to ascend while remaining in our body. This is the melding of the divine with the human. This is how far we have all evolved in terms of consciousness. It’s time to allow ourselves to ascend, without physically dying. But this requires trust—not in the mind—but a trust in the divine—that inner knowing that we have. Cultivating trust in who we are cannot happen if we have not experienced who we are, and to experience who we are requires getting still long enough to get out of the head. As long as we’re in the head trying to figure it all out, there’s no possibility to know, let alone trust. 

One of the beauties of this earthly adventure we devised is that we made it so we could not possibly lose touch with the inner knowing no matter how deeply lost we got within the mind, and believe me, I know what it means to get deeply lost. It’s as if I was down at the bottom of the ocean, so alienated from the heart, so trapped in emotional games—but the entire time, what was probably centuries by earth time, I had a cord attached to me that went all the way back to the surface where there was air. At any time if I needed a dose of air, I found this cord and took a breath, only to be quickly sucked back into the depths. Over time however, because of my soul’s intent, I have been slowly rising back to the surface. In this now moment I feel as though my head has popped up above the water! 

And so, first we need to get still and that begins to allow the divine to reveal itself—a little bit here, a little bit there. And when it occurs it is natural for us to run right back to the mind. This is because that’s where we feel safe. The mind reasons that that was nice and it can’t wait to tell someone whom we feel we can trust about it. But don’t ask the mind to let such an experience occur all the time, 24/7 because it has no desire for this. It has a fascination for study but doesn’t care much for full emersion into the experience. And that’s the total irony of it all because that’s exactly what we chose to do when we took a body. We chose to become fully emerged into this dimension without any memory of our past. It’s always a clean slate when we start over again as a baby. Well sort of. We do carry over that which we haven’t been able to trust, but that’s only because we know we’ve got a new clean slate to once again attempt to develop the trust—a trust we may have failed to achieve in the previous lifetime (which we realized at some point in that lifetime that we simply weren’t going to get it) and thus, opted out of the body so we could take a new one so as to give it another shot (more about this in my blog entry: karma). 

Just as Jesus volunteered to come to earth at a time when the energy was very thick, the Apostle Paul too volunteered to come on to the planet. He knew we weren’t capable of fully grasping what Jesus was just beginning to pioneer—ascension that is. So he (Paul) chose to create an elaborate theory about what it all meant—Jesus’ coming that is, and theory it was—all conjured up in his head because he too was lost in the depth of past and future, so alienated from the now, that is to say, from the divine that he truly was. But his thought gave the world something new to chew on. Although it was just a regurgitation of the old—the law that is, it did place the focus more on love, steering it away from revenge (eye for an eye, etc.); forgiveness rather than harboring resentment. But this was only necessary because we were still trapped into the identification with the mind, believing that we’re capable of being hurt and thus, capable of hurting another. The human can hurt, but the human is not who we are. 

What is happening is that now you—I mean YOU, who you really are, has grown tired of all this ranting and raving of the mind. It’s as if we are lunatics. And we are as long as we identify with the human. And by the way, what we see outside us is a reflection, but only of the human. The illusion we created is so convincing (yet an illusion nonetheless), and it serves as a mirror of the human at ALL times. Did you ever see Enter the Dragon with Bruce Lee? At one point in the movie he was trapped in a room full of mirrors and had to fight his way out of this maze. Well, this is what we are doing. We surrounded ourselves with a world full of mirrors of our human aspect—but we aren’t the human! Yet we believe we are so we identify with being only human heavily and thus get lost in the illusion. And now we’re trapped in needing to be accepted and that causes us to allow ourselves to be controlled and bingo, we are now ever so willing to confine ourselves to social morays, to act in such a way so that others will like us, accept us. And it is so thrilling on the one hand because this experience is quite dramatic (which allows us to feel something. Being alienated from the divine caused a loss of genuine feelings of compassion so the mind makes up for this by creating drama—now at least we feel alive), and yet so empty on the other hand because the drama lacks the freedom that only the now (divine) affords—the feeling of compassion, the forerunner to peace. But we allowed this to happen to ourselves and we’ve become quite comfortable with it. 

That is why the melding is a process. It requires a slow awakening (or remembering). It is the process of very gently and slowly willingly choosing to identify with our real nature of unconditional love and compassion. As stated above, the mind does not want to have this experience too often—at first—because it goes against everything it can possibly reason. For example, it’s not rational to trust when there’s absolutely no reason the mind can come up with to trust (because trusting requires letting go of control). And so it refuses to do so. But this process of ascension is a process of slowly wearing the mind down. Once, twice, three times, again, again, again, and each time you drift into the now and experience the divine for what it truly is, the mind pulls you right back out of it and questions, fears, doubts, sometimes even screams bloody murder, but the beauty of the process is that with each moment spent in the bosom of the divine comes a little bit more knowing, which is what allows for a little bit more trust and a little bit more joy and passion for life. This doesn’t seem like that big a deal to the mind because it knows it can always pull you back into the past or future, but when it starts to get the picture that what you truly want is to surrender control, well, this is cause for tremendous restlessness. Once the mind is convinced that ascension is what your purpose is, it jumps on the bandwagon by deciding it will try to figure out how to achieve this because it knows this will buy it more time. While it does know it’s going to have to eventually give up the control, it prefers—no—demands that it must understand all this first (damn it!). And now it’s spending all it’s time in this game of trying to reach ascension status and still has no intention of actually doing it—that is, fully emerging itself into the now. Surrendering its control is not on it’s “to do” list. 

Oh, again, it knows some day it’s going to have to. The more understanding it has of what ascension looks like, the more it realizes this truth. But it still has no real intention of actually doing it. Its very purpose, by design I might add, is to continue to distract us from the real prize—which is none other than the now, a place where the mind is not capable of going unless it gives up control. But again, the beauty of this process we are in is that knowing who we are on an experiential level cultivates trust and no one can take this trust away from us—not even the mind. And this trust is in compassion and acceptance. Knowing who you are means accepting who you are with full compassion—no need to change anything, not within you or outside you, including the mind. (Besides, the room full of mirrors that’s all around us is just an illusion. How can you change an illusion? Would you attempt to change a mirage? It’s silly when you think about it but that’s what we’re constantly trying to do. And we think we’re intelligent?). Having true compassion is only possible in the now because when we identify with the past (or future) we can only rationalize our way along. There is no real experience of compassion. For example, do I forgive or not? Do I even need to forgive? If this is all an illusion we don’t have to forgive for any reason because nothing happened. If there is no right or wrong then the person did nothing wrong any way so why would we forgive them? These kind of questions are endless. Identification with all this will only drive you crazy. In the now you just choose to love without agenda or attachment because you feel safe to do so, because you know you will always be taken care of. You just know (notice the word “now” in “know”). The divine KNOWS. That’s all it knows. And it doesn’t care about anything else. It really doesn’t care about the endless questions of the mind. Why? They are all so silly because it already KNOWS. It has no need to read a book or discuss something with others all in a vain attempt to figure out something because it knows the futility of analyzing an illusion. It KNOWS all that is real is love (and yet it adores the human that we are that thinks we need these things). And knowing on an experiential level allows for peace because when there is the absence of the need to understand, all that remains is the silence. The now is silent. There’s no past or future. No analyzing or scheming. There’s just the now—peace—quiet—eternally. This is the divine. 

We are now in the process of allowing the divine to meld with the human and that requires trust, and that requires knowing, and that requires getting still long enough to experience the knowing (or rather the “now”), and that requires making that choice. And that’s it. It’s really very simple. If you can give up all the need to understand and simply allow the knowing to bubble up from within, then you begin to know. And the more you know, the more you understand there’s nothing to understand. Who the hell cares? It’s all a very dense massive game, an illusion (the matrix) that we’ve been having so much fun playing in but that is so old and tiring now and part of us would prefer to just die because we are exhausted. 

And this is where all this is leading to. Ascension means death of the control of the mind and a birth into the now. It means the end of identification with everything the mind clings onto to maintain a sense of existence. It means going from a caterpillar to a butterfly. No longer crossing the road going in a straight line (as a caterpillar does) but rather, flying like the butterfly, on the whim of the wind, going wherever the breeze is taking us. Can you trust yourself enough to follow inspiration that flows from knowing, even if it pulls you away from all your goals? This requires no longer identifying with the mind. This is why the process is slow. You have to be able to discern the difference between what the mind is saying and what the heart knows. This is not possible until you’ve cultivated enough awareness of and thus trust in the divine within. It’s a bit of a Catch 22. Ignorance breeds ignorance. Becoming literate requires trust in something that is unknown in ignorance. That’s why Paul introduced the concept of “faith”. With Jesus’ crucifixion and resurrection, the human now had something to have faith in. And the human then trusted that through faith alone, we’ll eventually get to heaven. And this is where we’ve been stuck for 2000+ years. Knowing does not understand faith. Faith is a product of not knowing. Do you get this? Christianity requires faith because it doesn’t know. Ascension means the human melds with the divine so that he/she now knows who he/she is. This is bringing heaven to earth rather than waiting to get there—somewhere else, later after you physically die. Heaven is now. It’s ascension while still living in a physical body. But the mind doesn’t get this. 

The mind is old hat. It’s worn a huge rut into the crevice of our brain and will continue to do so as long as we choose to identify with it. Not that the mind isn’t helpful at times, it’s just that it was never meant to be our guide. If we choose to identify with the soul, the divine, the now, we move to an entirely different reality, one in which all things are possible because there are no restrictions. The mind has created all the restrictions. In fact, the entire physical world is just a hologram, an illusion projected outward by the mind. We created it and then popped ourselves into it much like if you were watching a movie and then just decided to jump up into the stream of light coming from the projector and flow right on to the screen and into the world you were just watching a few moments before. Now you are in it—experiencing it as a reality. We are on the movie set all the time, creating our own reality TV show, much like in the movie “Truman” as portrayed by Jim Carey. This is what this world is. Outside the illusion is a world of love and trust beyond our imagination. 

On the wings of love we just soar above the clouds and experience—period. There’s no more need to figure anything out. The mystery of it all is incredibly intriguing and yet there’s an intense knowing that you KNOW so you just accept the mystery. You’re OK with it. Then, there’s nothing all that mysterious about it. You just trust it and revel in it. This is where I choose to go. Can you imagine how scrumptious and luscious that kind of life could be? No more worries? No more fear? No more doubt? Getting there requires getting out of the head and into the now (know). This requires trust. There is no other way that I’m aware of.


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