Posted by: justbewhoyouare | July 14, 2011

HOW YOUR HEART EXPANDS

When we begin a new lifetime, our soul is the one that determines what kind of experience we intend to have within that lifetime. As part of the overall process of remembering who we really are, the soul always desires to expand so it can remember something about itself. Towards this end, your soul is constantly arranging for experiences to come into your life that will hopefully keep you on track towards accomplishing whatever it had in mind for that particular lifetime.

Meanwhile, as a human, we generally makes choices based on the directive of the mind and depending on what those choices are, they will either allow us to move towards or away from fulfilling the soul’s purpose. When the choices cause us to move away from our soul’s intent, it then has to arrange some kind of experience to get us back on a track that is more closely in alignment with what it knows we came to do. The point is that the soul, which is who we really are, is the one calling the shots in our life in the long run, not the human mind.

The soul uses contrast within this world of duality to attempt to influence us to make choices that will truly serve us, given the soul’s intention. Here’s how it works. When the contrast of life causes drama, so that you are experiencing something you wish would just as soon go away, your heart puts out the vibration of asking for things to get better. In other words, if someone mistreats you, your heart asks to be treated better but what it’s really asking for is to become capable of treating others better. Remember, life is a reflection of who we are on the inside so if you’re being mistreated this is showing you that you carry within you the energy of mistreating others. You are probably bringing it in from a previous life, especially if you have no recollection of mistreating anyone in this life. In fact, you could say that becoming someone who is capable of treating others better is precisely what the soul wants for you because so far in previous lifetimes you haven’t learned how to be that way. This is why such contrast has shown up in the first place—so you will potentially expand your heart.

Now, because you are the creator, when your heart asks for this, the mere fact that you have asked causes your heart (or soul) to immediately expand to become a person who is capable of treating others better. This means your heart has literally expanded so now you are, in that moment, capable of treating that other person the way you wish they had treated you. Such ability has now become a potential that you the human can choose whereas before you did not have this potential. The question is, will you choose it? Will you choose to treat that person who mistreated you in a way that will teach them how you would have preferred to be treated or will you extract revenge by choosing to do unto them the same thing they did to you? Because your heart has expanded so that it is capable of loving more deeply now, if you make the latter choice you will in fact be in resistance to your soul’s expansion and you will feel this resistance within your very being.

For example, let’s say there’s a bully in your life who seems to enjoy persecuting you occasionally. Each time he does, your heart cries out for help because you don’t understand why this is happening to you. You don’t realize you created the bully so you would learn how to have compassion for him and yourself because the bully is there to show you who you are. He is a reflection of you. Instead, you just wish the bully would go away. Okay, so your soul hears your cry for help and immediately your heart expands to a new level of love. You now have the ability to see this bully through the eyes of compassion. If you were to choose such compassion, you would realize this bully was teaching you that you too have a bullying nature within yourself. Thanks to now having compassion, you can choose to give it to the bully in you, which will cause your inner bully to melt and integrate within you. Now the bully inside you has no more reason to act out because he feels loved and safe. The reason he was being a bully in the first place was because you had never allowed him to feel safe because you had never loved him. And, he existed inside you because the light energies of love, joy and appreciation have natural opposites in the dark energies of hate, anger and jealously, for example.

If you were to choose this process of integrating your own bullying nature, this would then create a whole new set of potentials in terms of your relationship with the external bully who seems to enjoy persecuting you. It’s possible because of your integrating work that your soul will simply remove any need to write that bully into your script. He will just disappear from your life and you may never know what happened to him. This is because you are no longer placing any attention on him. Another potential would be that when the bully shows up, you express your compassion towards him. At first he may not acknowledge this but it will nevertheless have an affect on him on some level and if you continue to love him, in time he could change his attitude and become your best friend. The point is that when you ask for help, the answer comes in the form of your heart expanding and if you choose to express your newfound capacity to love, now the solution to your problem unfolds right before your eyes, and it happened because of you, not because of something outside of you coming in and saving the day.

Such is the potential miracles we all have in us waiting to be manifested. But, typically none of the above scenarios occur because what happens is that after you continually ask and no help ever seems to appear from beyond the horizon, your anger increases towards that bully, and towards God as well I might add, because He doesn’t seem to give a damn about your situation. You feel a sense of injustice and your pleas for help turn to pleas for justice, and when these cries still receive no sign of being answered by God, you decide to take matters into your own hands. Soon you find yourself a weapon and when that bully shows up again, you either “teach him a lesson” or you murder him.

According to the way energy works, because you have pushed away your own dark bullying nature and worse, have attempted to destroy that same darkness that appeared in your external world, what you have actually done is caused it to get bigger. So, you thought you had eliminated your enemy but one day suddenly a gang of bullies shows up at your door and beats the crap out of you. Now you’re furious and your cries for help magnify. This means your heart is now expanding to a whole new level. You now have the ability to love an entire gang of bullies, which by the way, also exists within yourself. They are there because when that external bully showed up, it was showing you the one bully you had inside yourself but you refused to embrace it. Instead, you pushed him away, causing him to expand. The external gang that suddenly showed up at your door was simply an external reflection of what was now a whole gang of bullies that exists inside you. Again, typically instead of choosing to create a safe space inside yourself which would allow these hurting, angry bullies you created, also inside yourself, to find comfort and to feel embraced, instead you go on the war path and begin assembling an army so you’ll be ready when those external bullies show up again. Or, you might just go looking for them and when you find them, invade their space and destroy them. If you’re following my train of thought here you could probably continue with this scenario until you eventually get to the point in which you have a Hitler inside yourself, one who feels terribly mistreated and has a huge need for justice to be served—somebody has got to pay for your suffering! And this Hitler begins plans to take over the world. This is why such things have occurred historically.

Let’s look at this from a different angle. When you’ve been mistreated by someone and have no desire to love this person at all, choosing revenge feels normal because that’s all you’re capable of choosing. This is because you have not as yet had any real desire to remember who you are so you have not identified at all with the compassionate loving being your soul is. But when being mistreated causes you to sincerely ask for an improvement in how you are being treated, you are now asking to become capable of treating others better, and this changes the entire game because your asking goes out to the other dimensions and connects with a neutral energy potential that resembles your choice. This has the effect of transforming your energy so that you become someone who now knows how to treat others better. You have literally expanded yourself because you are the creator. However, if you’re not aware of this and simply choose to extract revenge, you are now acting in a way that is not at all in alignment with how you have just become capable of acting. Again, this will cause you to feel the resistance within your being between the aspect that seeks revenge and the real you that is capable of forgiving. There is an energetic pull that takes place and this shows up as guilt or shame. You feel as though you are being stretched like a rubber band and the more you ignore this and continue acting in resistance to who you have become, the more guilt and shame, and probably anger as well, will wreak havoc within you.

In addition, the more challenging your life’s circumstances are, the more intense the asking becomes, and thus the more your heart or soul expands to become one who is able to embrace the aspect of you that is more deeply hurting. As you can see, if you continue to resist expressing yourself in the way in which you’ve expanded to become, the contrast within you between who you are and what you’re choosing to be is only going to stretch further so that inside you will feel tremendous intensity. If you don’t know what’s going on, you could literally go crazy from the intensity, or go from being a bully towards one person to being a dictator over an entire country. This is what happens the more we choose to alienate ourselves from our true divine nature.

In the New Energy, all our emotional aspects from all our previous lifetimes are now beginning to come back and they are seeking resolution. This is the soul’s intention for this particular lifetime we are all living. This means our aspects want to be integrated within us rather than to remain separated, which is what’s been happening ever since we created them. In other words, they want to experience the love they didn’t receive when we first created them. Our love and compassion allows these aspects to find resolution and thus integrate within us, and this is the very process of the divine melding with the human.

In order for this to occur on a global level, we have all agreed on a soul level to allow the entire creation to support us in this melding process. This explains why weather patterns are shifting and natural disasters are taking place on a global scale. While this appears to be very dramatic, it is actually providing opportunity for all of us to make new choices. Very few go unaffected because of the media attention such disasters receive. Whether you are affected directly through losing your home or a loved one, or perhaps being personally injured, or affected indirectly by living nearby or simply feeling for those who are affected directly, without exception your situation is absolutely perfect. It is exactly what your personal soul created for you to expand your heart, given the fact that you came here in this lifetime to remember who you really are and to allow all your aspects to come home to your heart. Your soul knows exactly what you need to bring your aspects home and meanwhile, your soul is also working in conjunction with the souls of all other humans so that a greater level of expansion can occur globally. Between personal expansion and global expansion, all events somehow manage to work together. This is not something the mind will ever be able to grasp and the truth is, you’re not responsible for anyone else. Focus on what works for you and let your soul and the soul of the rest of humanity work out the rest. They are all one and the same anyway.

An understanding of what’s really going on around the globe will be a tremendous asset in helping to get you through these intense times because there is truly nothing to be afraid of. The most important thing you can do is to make the choice to expand your heart so it has the capacity of being a channel for the unconditional love and compassion you have deep inside. Such a choice will help you flow with the external experiences your soul is arranging for you to have because your soul does indeed intend for you to remember who you really are. Thus, whatever you need to experience is going to happen whether you like it or not. If you are aware of what is happening when challenges appear, it is far less likely you will resist them. Yes, you might initially get angry but because you understand what’s happening, you’ll be able to recognize this as one of your aspects popping up and will be more capable of choosing to love this aspect than someone who doesn’t understand.

This means we are being invited by our soul to begin identifying with the expanded inner being that we’ve become. In other words, we have to reach deep inside and find the love and compassion that life’s circumstances have caused our heart or soul to become (due to our asking). In essence, we have to create a safe space within our hearts. To create this inner space you have to take time to go inside yourself and discover the compassionate, unconditionally loving being that dwells in there. This requires a commitment to yourself, being willing to make remembering who you really are your top priority, more important than anything else. To get to this level of commitment takes time but the best thing you can do is start by making the choice. Be gentle with yourself and allow yourself to falter in your commitment (trust me, it’s going to happen). Set aside some time each day to breathe and relax, which helps to calm the mind a bit. This also helps you to begin feeling with your heart. While breathing, tell yourself how much you love you. Slowly you will cultivate a compassion that will eventually expand to become a foundation inside you that no one could possibly take away from you. This foundation is your inner Source of security and comfort. The more you experience it, the less you will feel a need to look outside yourself for it and the more you will be capable of focusing on exactly what you know you want rather than getting distracted by potentials that don’t really serve you. 

Giving love and attention to your aspects doesn’t necessarily mean allowing them to act out with their emotions. In fact, it almost always means the opposite. Compassion means to just let them be. Feel them. Experience them. Allow them to have their say, yet without the need to take action. Remember, it’s not about the one outside you that triggered the aspect. They are a plant, written into your life’s script by your soul to give you an opportunity to allow the aspect to come home and thus, for you to become more integrated. Remember too, this is what your intent was. You asked for inner healing. Thus, the outside trigger for your aspects is a gift from your soul, an answer to having asked. You wanted to be free to express who you really are. By choosing compassion over a need to put on your gloves and battle, you have effectively become Source in that moment. You have expanded your heart and no one can ever take that away from you. It’s yours forever. This is the process of becoming more and more beautiful every day—the melding of the divine with the human.

If you deny some of your aspects, often others will show up, such as depression, sadness, hurt, pain, sorrow, or self-pity. Such feelings can best be described as the feeling of “no one loves me” and this is because love from someone outside you is not the love your aspects are seeking. Even if someone else does love you, your aspects want your love. This love has to come deep from within you. Other’s love is not good enough for your aspects. If you are surrounded by all your loved ones you may still not feel deeply loved. And even if you do, when they all go away, and eventually they all will, you are left with yourself and unless you have cultivated a deep connection with yourself, with who you really are, you will feel empty, lonely and depressed.

When this happens, you may choose to seek out a mentor, coach, or just a friend for help. They may tell you to get over it or to pick yourself up by your bootstraps and get on with life. You might resolve to become positive and begin doing things that make you feel better. Typically, I would do acts of kindness, like volunteer to serve others. You might even go to a counselor who will begin digging into your past, attempting to understand why you’re becoming so emotional. I spent thousands of dollars on counseling. There’s nothing right or wrong about doing any of these, it’s just that I was still looking outside myself for acknowledgment and acceptance but such love from the outside never fulfilled me because I was looking for others to give me what I was refusing to give myself. Love from an outside source has no permanency to it because it does not come from within. When you choose to cultivate a relationship with what’s inside you, it is permanent. Besides, if you focus on trying to change your past you’re still placing energy on something you don’t want so it’s definitely not going to go away.

For example, it’s possible I was in prison in some lifetime because in the spring of 2007, I found myself in heavy credit card debt and was being pursued by collection agencies. Their harassing phone calls caused tremendous emotions of fear to pop up. I spent time nearly every day hugging myself, telling myself how much I loved me. One night the intensity of the situation peaked. I awoke in the middle of the night from a dream in which I had been in a prison and was being harassed by other inmates. I was in so much fear that I began sobbing in trepidation. For a short time, I was heavily identifying with being a hurting victim. When coming from such a place, I felt helpless to do anything and was begging for help to be free of these emotions. However, suddenly I remembered who I am. That’s when compassion began flowing from within. I was still sobbing but now the words coming out of my own mouth were coming from the real me and that felt empowering. These were words of love, not of a victim crying out for help, and I was very comforted by them. I put my arms around me and said things like, “It’s okay Paul. I am here now. Don’t worry. Everything is going to be alright. Everything is going to work out some how. I don’t know how but I am that I am and I love you and I won’t let you go to prison. I will always be with you.” The more I spoke, the more comforted I felt. I knew something profound was happening because this had happened before. This experience, combined with several others of a similar nature, were the process I went through for several years to build a deep foundation of love within me—a love I never knew I had.

Aspects show up because they know you are feeling safe, so the potential exists that you will treat them with compassion. Like a little kid who wants his mother to love him, he’s not going to approach her when she’s angry or depressed but rather, when she’s in a good mood. That’s when he feels safe enough to show up and ask for love. This is precisely how our aspects operate as well. When one of them shows up, it’s just looking for some attention and love. True love, or compassion, means to honor the emotions of the particular aspect that is up, not seeking to change it in any way. As I was developing compassion for my aspects, I learned to say things like, “Yes, I honor and accept you just the way you are. Thank you for trusting me enough to show up right now, I love you. It’s going to be alright,” and “I am that I am.” These tools are what I call my “Four Phrases” that have helped tremendously to integrate tons of aspects. I also learned that as I cultivated compassion within, breathing was a tremendous help. 

It is my passion to share with you that melding with the divine is absolutely possible. It just requires actively choosing on a conscious level to identify with the compassionate being that you are rather than with your thoughts. Your entire life can change by making one simple choice—to begin loving and accepting everything about yourself at any given moment. True love is saying yes to everything going on within yourself without exception; reveling in the experience. This intent alone begins the process of the divine melding with the human and causes forces unseen by human eyes to begin helping you in this melding process. In other words, energy works in service to you.

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